1. Katie comes in to borrow my gardening kit and catches me playing computer games. She says: 'I'm working, so you have to.' A few hours later, the garden is much neater and 300 Beautiful Things is taking shape.
2. Crowds of morris men waving handkerchiefs on the Pantiles.
3. We walk into a restaurant and the waiter says: 'Welcome to the madhouse.' We are confronted by what looks like a scene from Nurse Matilda:
Coriander was lifting Amelie up so she could climb a pillar, much to the horror of the dating couple trying to have a date behind it.
Gregory was banging a spoon on the table.
Holly and Daisy were having a screaming match.
Marcus was tipping salt into the packets of sugar and putting them back in the bowl.
Noah was seeing how many breadsticks he could get up his nose.
Victoria, Joshua and Jacob were trying to get round the entire table without touching the ground.
All the other children were doing simply dreadful things too.