Not needed, amble and worth the work.

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1. Alec is at nursery, Bettany is sleeping, Nick is somewhere downstairs. I lie on the attic bed and realise that I am not needed by anyone and there is no anxious knot in my middle.

2. I amble easily across the Common for a swim and massage at the Spa Hotel.

3. The massage is incredibly painful and not relaxing (though the facial that follows is mind-blowing) but at the end of it the knots are gone from my shoulders and there is no sharp ache in my right arm.

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