1. I cleaned my kitchen floor. It is a different colour and there are no longer fluffs the size of your fist under the computer.
2. The accountant at the Duke of York who whipped out his hem-hem to show off the 16 piercings to three slack-jawed friends.
3. Learning the words to the last two verses of Seven Drunken Nights.
Gale, fallen and ready for school.
1. The wind is thumping the rain against the house, but we don't have to go anywhere today. 2. In the park after supper I pick up a han...
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1. An enormous fat bumble bee at work. She is so bulky that she can knock dead blossoms out of the way as she gets right in to the new jasmi...
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1. The shortest night and the longest day. I was up at Wellington Rocks with Anna, Paul and Jason. We couldn't see the sun through the m...
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1. Oli has written a poem describing how Tunbridge Wells makes him veer between wanting to fall in love and wanting to shoot people. Which i...